Saturday, August 31, 2013

What’s the appropriate response to the new parents of a baby with Down Syndrome?

Congratulations!, says this mother.

DEAR AMY: I’m responding to your answer to “Caring Colleague,” the person wanting to know how to respond to a friend’s announcement of his sibling’s new child with Down syndrome.

I felt your answer was well-meant but wrong. As a parent of a 7-year-old with Down, I received both wonderful and horrid responses to the news of my child’s diagnosis. The correct answer is “Congratulations!” Period.

At the birth of a typically chromosomed child, one does not temper their joy at the thought of the work involved, the possibilities of difficult times (think drug abuse, teen drama, car accidents, school trouble, etc.) ahead. That comes with being a parent.

Just because the challenges faced by parents with kids with Down are different than the planned challenges, there is simply no need to acknowledge the road ahead as tougher than anyone else’s road. It is more work; it is more worry. But the benefits of having a child with Down totally level the playing field here. The birth of this child is a joyful thing. End of story. -- Proud Mom

Amy Dickinson advice column, Washington post.

2 comments:

R·E said...

Not sure what I'd say. I guess I'd try to see how they felt, and congratulate them on being parents.

I'd imagine the people would want REAL responses rather than FAKE supportive responses, but I wouldn't look to an advice column to provide any kind of legit advice. HA

Just stopped by b/c you commented on my blog, rekzkarz.com -- THANKS

Norma said...

The advice isn't from the columnist, but from the mother of a Down baby. I'll take her word for it that Congratulations, as one would say to any parent, is the appropriate response.